Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Note to Self

Never watch Rob Pattinson interviews with my husband.

Exhibit A: The Today Show Interview

Hubby: Is his coat ripped?
Me: Shhhhhhhhh.

Hubby: What's up with his hair?
Me: Shhhhhhhhh.

Hubby: Why does he keep messing with his hair?
Me: Shhhhhhhhh.

Hubby: *big sigh*
Me: Shhhhhhhhh.

Hubby: That was stupid. He didn't say anything. He didn't even answer the questions. Am I supposed to know what his movie was about from that?!
Me: (in my head - Shhhhhhhhhut the f#ck up!) That was really short.

Exhibit B: Late Night with Jimmy Fallon "Bothered" Spot

Me: I have been waiting all day to watch this! *grinning from ear to ear* Do you remember the videos I showed you awhile back with Jimmy Fallon spoofing Rob?
Hubby: I think so.

Me: Well, Rob actually gets in the tree with Jimmy. It's what we all were hoping for.
Hubby: We were?

Me: You know what I mean.
Hubby: I think I remember the videos.

Me: *push play*
Hubby: Who's that?

Me: *push pause* Jimmy Fallon.
Hubby: I thought you were talking about that other Jimmy guy.

Me: Jimmy Kimmel?
Hubby: Yeah, that guy.

Me: You don't remember the videos.
Hubby: Guess not.

Me: *push play*
Hubby: Is he supposed to be Rob or Edward?

Me: (in my head - At least he knows who Rob and Edward are.) Shhhhhhhhh.
Hubby: Wasn't Rob on Jimmy Kimmel?

Me: Yes. Shhhhhhhhh.
Hubby: *silence*

Me: *laughing out loud*
Hubby: That was stupid.

Me:  (in my head - Shhhhhhhhhut the f#ck up!) *push rewind* Man, he was such a good sport to do that. Too funny! *push play*
Hubby: You're watching it again?!

Me: Well, you were talking through half of it.
Hubby: *gets up from couch and goes into the kitchen*

Exhibit C: Late Night with Jimmy Fallon Interview

Me: Do you want to watch the actual interview?
Hubby: *comes back into living room and sits down* Sure.

Me: *press play*
Hubby: Do you really like his hair?

Me: Shhhhhhhhh.
Hubby: Does he always do that with his hair?! It looks all greasy. He has to be getting that on his hand.

Me: Shhhhhhhhh.
Hubby: The other Jimmy's funnier.

Me: *push stop*
Hubby: You done?

Me: *hand him the remote and count to ten* I'm going to go and get on the computer for awhile.
Hubby: *switches to a hunting channel*

Me: *push play on DVR in my office*
Hubby: Now what are you watching?

Me: The View.
Hubby: Who's on that?

Me: Jimmy Kimmel.
Hubby: At this time of the day?

(To see the entire interview, click here.)


itsjustme1217 said...

Forgive me for LMAO?

Anonymous said...

Oh that was hilarious. After spending the last week trying to explain my 'new life' to my very best friend, I can relate. We so want our favorite people to get what tickles us and it sucks when they look at us like we're fuckin nuts. We're not, right?

mmMoxie said...

BAAAHHHAHAHAHA! I refuse to watch anything Rob related while Mr. Moxie is even in the house. He likes to go on and on about how gay Rob and Twilight are. JEALOUS??? Thats what I thought.

smartEpantz said...

OMFG!! Were you hiding behind my couch last night, taking notes and shit??!!
I can press charges ya know.
My hubtard took silent pics on his iphone of my reaction to rob on fallon...I look like I have special needs.


missmalarky said...


NibbleitPattinsonakaNebilet said...

OMG Lisa, we are married to the same man!!! I feel like we should be neighbours and our husbands hang out or something. WoW, I'm chuckling so much the repair guy in my room is giving me strange looks and has just asked if I can prop the doot open pmsl. Like I'm gonna jump him pfft please, I have Rob on here!!!

LED Signs said...

Hey dude, the conversation is really a good one. The videos are also very clear in understanding and also the English used is very simple and easy.

BiteME!!! said...

Super funny! I don't allow my husband to participate in my "Rob time". He's way too annoying and I really do want to continue loving him;) I let him watch the movies with me (once). He's a bit jealous, so that's kind of cute. Men, ugh!

Twilight Mommy said...

LMAO! I swear to gawd your writing an exact conversation I've had with my hubby millions of times. Just fill in the blanks with alot more swearing LOL. Thanks for the peek into your life :)


Dangrdafne said...

Lisa, that was just the most wonderful way to start my day!! One I was so happy to see your update in my blog roll and then I get here and you have written the most hilarious post! LMAO!

All I know is thank goodness I was DVRing John Stewart while watching it - as my hubby proceeded to talk through the WHOLE thing!! I pretty much always try to watch these things WITHOUT the hubby. He always says he wants to see them but then he either talks or does something else noisy during them and I miss it. So I just DVR them and watch them when he isn't around. Thank goodness for technology :)

TwiWeasel said...

@ LIsa - Good to see a post, dahling!! I don't even bother trying to watch anything Rob related at home. First off, the kids have all of the tvs on either Disney or Nicelodeon and then, my hubster is...less than understanding (read:Jealous). I always know I can watch them later online anyway. *grin*

Twifiltered brain said...

LOL. Did you hear John Stewart's advice?

While promoing his show last night before it came on he went all suave and said,

"Ladies, put your husbands to bed and hide your ovaries!"

I have always loved him but love him even more for saying that! He really connected with us!

Twilove1 said...

(Yay!!! Blog post from Lisa!!!)

LMFAO!!! Lisa, your husband and mine would get along very well! He doesn't understand my Twilight fixation at all, but tries to be supportive cause it makes me happy. Basically he just humors me awhile and eventually leaves the room quietly. It doesn't even phase him anymore when I go to see New Moon for the upteenth time.

Jayla said...

i'm glad i'm not the only one who seems to have a similar issue...

gawd- the jimmy fallon tree segment had me pmsl... adorkable rob at his best.

um- hated the view... dayum barbara wawa .. edward does NOT have fangs!

Twired Jen said...

Too funny Lisa. My bf watched The View with me on TV...he actually didn't make fun of him...In fact he's said he can understand why women find him attractive...Is my bf GAY? JK
He likes to roll his eyes a lot, but he did behave himself during The View. I think he was just trying to get laid. LOL

MissAmyJoon said...

Yay Lisa!

I only watch interviews when no one is present to bother me. Yesterday I was watching Rob on the Daily Show. Mom, my brother, and I typically watch it together and once the promo came on and said Rob was on my brother starts making fun of me right away! Psh...if I said anything during one of his precious football games I would be done with.

Z Any Mouse said...

LOL! You have illustrated perfectly why I wouldn't even consider watching any of those vids with Mr. AnyMouse. It would be a total buzz-kill on my Robporn.

E said...

Love it Lisa!! Thank goodness for DVR, huh?! Erin McG

sparkle for twilight said...

Lisa! I just caught up on all the Rob interviews this week last night and I could never watch with anyone only because I know I'd get the same kind of questions you were getting. I'm not married but I certainly know that if my dad were here and present he would say the EXACT same things! lol

BTW I kind of felt awkward for Emilie during The View, she was probably like what am I even doing here? They could have put more a little more effort into transitioning questions from Rob to her (about Lost)!

Mama Cougar said...

OMFG Lisa....this totally cracked my shit up! LOVED the dialogue between you & Mr. Forever...FULL.OF.WIN.

Safe to say, since my hubby is a certified Twiguy, it didn't go down like that at my house. He sat patiently and quietly while I reviewed and rewound and rewatched everything I'd DVR'ed. Finally, after the Fallon interview, he giggled and said "Christ, he touched his hair 19 times in like, 3 minutes."

Anyway....(imagine Bella's voice here) "How's the baseball thing going?"

The Cougar's Den

You're still coming 3/20 right? Because I'm totally making your shirt this weekend.

Micki_Martini said...

Hilarious!! I don't share my Rob obsession with MrM, I would never hear the end of it. It's weird but I think he would be jealous. I guess if he stared at Megan Fox on the internet all day I would think that's weird, or if he had 50+ pictures of her in his cellphone photo gallery (yup I have a different Rob screensaver each week!). Even if I did ask him to watch a Rob interview, after 2 seconds he would be walking to the other room for either Big Ten network or that hunting channel. He's such a man.

17foreverlisa said...

@itsjustme1217 - There’s nothing I wouldn’t forgive you for, girlie!

@suzspetals – Ha! I’ve tried explaining it to my best friend before, too, and I can see in her eyes that she thinks I’ve lost it.

@mmMoxie – My son loves to tell me how gay Rob and Twilight are. My husband may think it, but he doesn’t say it. I’ve definitely learned my lesson about watching anything Rob related with him in the same room anyway. I watch too much for me to wait for him to be out of the house!

@smartEpantz – LMAO!! You have to share a pic or two with us!!!!

@missmalarky – That is so sweet. Thanks!! I’m usually in my office every night looking up what’s new with Rob and my husband has gotten in the habit of coming in at some point and asking just that, “What’s new with Rob?” For real!

@Nibbles – Wh-a-a-a-a-t? You’re just trying to lure me into the attic, aren’t you? My husband says he’ll never move. How do you feel about the Midwest? LOL! Too freaking funny about the repair guy.

@LED Signs – Dude, glad you could join us. Hahahaha!

@BiteME!!! – Love the ...and I really do want to continue loving him line!!

@Twilight Mommy – Just think if our hubbies got together and wrote about us ;)

@Dangrdafne – It felt good to write a post and even better that you girls found it funny. It’s really how my night went watching the vids him. Thus the “note to self.”

@TwiWeasel – Thanks, girlie. All you girls and your jealous husbands; that just tells me that they want to keep you around!

@Twifilgered brain – The JStew interview was an instant classic. Loved it!!!

@Twilove1 – My husband would definitely get along with yours and I already know I’d get along with you!

@Jayla – We definitely have to stick together. Adorkable Rob in the tree with Jimmy Fallon had me doing a fist pump, too. I am still smiling just thinking about it. Not to mention the fact that Rob looked hot as hell with his sexhair blowing in the wind. And I was totally pissed that “wawa” did not prep for the damn interview. Seriously!

@Twired Jen – Oh you see me practically every day for my daily fix ;) I don’t think your bf is gay. I think he’s bi. I kid. I kid. Mwah!

@Amy – Since I have an empty nest, as you well know, it’s not hard to get alone time with Rob at my house. I usually wait until my husband is engrossed in a hunting show or an old western movie in the living room or fallen asleep. My office is my h(e)aven.

@Z Any Mouse – It was a total buzz-kill on my Robporn, but it didn’t take me long to rev it back up later. Just sayin’ ;)

@Erin McG – You lurker, you. I’ve already talked to you at work about the post. Thanks for commenting, though. XXXOOO

@sparkle for twilight – Even at my age, or maybe because of my age, I wouldn’t want to watch it with my dad around either. It would definitely be worse than watching it with my husband. At least my husband humors me. And I felt terrible for Emilie. The idiots on The View asked her a couple of questions and then never let her answer them. She even seemed a little pissed with some of Rob’s answers. That’s the first time I’ve even watched that show and it was only because Rob was on there. It was totally what I expected. Did you watch the exit interview video on put on the post? It’s so cute!

@Mama Cougar - …Mr. Forever. Now that cracked my shit up! I know you have your very own Twiguy/Unicorn, and I can’t wait to meet him. I’m definitely coming to the party, and I can’t believe you’re making shirts for us. Too fun(ny). You do know my high school cheerleader body is long gone, right?

Did your puppy, Bella, bark that question? LOL!! Seriously. Travis is healthy, happy, and pitching in St. Louis tomorrow. We’ll be on the road with him from the 5th through the 15th. Can’t wait! Thanks for asking.

@Micki_Martini - We definitely have a double standard for our men, don't we? Sounds like our husbands would get along great, too. He watches hunting and the Big Ten network alot. Actually, we both love the Big Ten network. We're in Illinois. Where are you??

Mama Cougar said...

Dear Miss 17-Forever-but-only-in-the-head-because-the-body-ain't-fucking-17-anymore,

Worry not, I am always prepared. You will have a size choice. But, no overly-bagginess allowed. It has to squeeze you in all the right places.


17foreverlisa said...

Maybe I'll bring my Edward blanket to wrap around me just in case. LOL!!!

sparkle for twilight said...

Oh yes, I was going to mention thanks for linking the exit interview because I hadn't seen it! Well if anything about Emilie, at least it's Rob Pattinson that's stealing her thunder, there's not much anyone else can do when people start going crazy about him! (I was also pretty embarrassed for those ladies bringing up some of those topics with his entire family in the audience)

Isabella MARIE Cullen said...

OMFG! Lisa!!!! I almost wet myself! I am still laughing while I am typing this. I absolutely and totally feel your pain and as I'm reading this....I feel like I am right there! They just don't get it, so I try to keep hubby out of the loop as much as possible. He was moaning and groaning the other day because I totally hijacked the DVR and he pretty much suspected the reason for it. For a brief insane moment I actually thought that I would show him the Bothered bit....he might laugh. But then I recovered from that brain fart and stopped myself. I would have just been pissed when he just sat there staring at the screen and shaking his head at me. So I saved myself the aggravation. Anyway, great post!!!!

Micki_Martini said...

Hi Lisa,
We're practically neighbors. I live in Wisconsin, 20 minutes south of Madison.

Hope to meet you in FFOOOORRRKKSS!!

Micki (UW '05)

17foreverlisa said...

@IMC - That is why I had to get a second DVR! There were so many times that I was recording two programs and then he wanted to watch something else. When the New Moon mania was about to hit, I called about the second DVR (we have DirecTV). Turns out, there was a rebate on the unit and they don't charge anything extra per month to have it. It was a no brainer and has helped saved our marriage ;)

@Micki - I am a HUGE Brett Favre fan. I don't know if that helps or hurts our connection, but I rooted for the Packers for years. GO ILLINI and the BIG TEN!!!!

led signs said...

I pretty much always try to watch these things without the hubby. He always says he wants to see them but then he either talks or does something else noisy during them and I miss it.

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